X- I might be villain in your story but I love you.

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Long time since we talked...... So, I cleared my step 2 CK and CS exam. I scored 231 in CK. Al though not a great score to cover my CS attempt, but I am hopeful that I will match this year. I have applied in lots of programs. Hopefully someone somewhere may realize that we are more than just scores . Well, I started contacting a lot of my friends and colleagues to help me with an interview call. I am also seeking help from strangers. Al though, I find this practise futile and useless. And to be very honest, they are reluctant to help me because I do not have the credentials. It is neither their fault nor mine, I can understand how problematic it could be for them. Interestingly, one of my friends told me that you can email the program director and tell him that you are my class fellow and you have heard great things about the program. CS is an exam which is totally unpredictable. Anything can happen to anyone. I may not be the brightest student or I may not have best of luck with me...
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X- if somebody would ask me what i want the most in my Life, i would say to him that All i want is the love of that special person and keep breathing !
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Not today!

Why didn't she fight for us? Wasn't I a good friend to her? I did everything for her and supported her through out. I do not expect her to reciprocate these things but I expect her to be a good friend and end things well with me. She owes that much to me.... At least, that is what I thought. The flash backs that I have about us are enough to pull me into a spiral of constant negative self talk for at least a day. Every day without her was a challenge at the start but the healing process has probably started. However, there are some bad days like today when I am reminded that she exist. On days like today, I wish that she will reach out to me and make things right between us...However, It is not right that I am still expecting her to reach out to me to make things right between us. I know for a fact that no matter what she will say she can not fix anything. Then expecting anything from her is just idiotic.  Realizing that people especially good people in your life can l...
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